I recently read a post titled 21 Things I Irrationally Hate. I loved the idea of it and, since I have been trying very hard to keep “hate” out of my vocabulary, decided to write about things I can’t stand (not all irrationally). I would like to follow up with 21 things I love, so stay tuned!
Without further ado:
- The word lisp. As an SLP, I think this word is just plain mean. What asshole decided this?
- Mouth sounds, especially chewing and sucking. During meditation at the end of a yoga class the woman next to me popped a cough drop. Instead of focusing on my inner peace, I contemplated punching her in the face for ten minutes.
- Computer illiteracy. It is completely unacceptable in this day and age to not know how to attach a document to an email. Especially after you’ve been shown five times.
- Clowns. They’re just really creepy.
- Needles. I hate shots and blood draws, but I have a tattoo and plan to get more. I realize this doesn’t make much sense.
- Bad drivers. I think everyone can relate to this one with me. I also think everyone has been a bad driver at one point or another.
- The cost of tampons. I swear they cost more every month.
- Endometriosis. Refer to my post If Endometriosis were a person… for reasoning.
- Dry feet and hands. I can’t sleep if my feet or hands feel dry. There’s this icky feeling of them being up against my nice soft sheets that forces me out of bed to put on lotion no matter what time of night.
- Mosquito bites. Another itchy feeling. I’ve actually gone to the pharmacy at 2am to buy anti-itch cream after waking up several times scratching.
- Lipstick. It’s one of those fashion things I really wish I could get into. I see it look great on so many people, but I just look like a 10 year old playing dress up with mommy’s make up. Maybe I just need to find the right color?
- People who spell/say my name wrong. I get it, Carolyn and Caroline are very close. However, if I sign an email with my name and you respond with the wrong spelling, I question your intelligence. And when you call me Caroline after I have corrected you 30 times, I think you’re a jerk.
- “Sweet Caroline.” I can’t tell you how many drunk boys sang this to me in college. Ugh!
- Confusion of you’re/your, there/their/they’re, and to/too. I’m not really the grammar police because I certainly make mistakes, but these ones really drive me nuts.
- Unprofessional dress at work. Leggings are not pants. Period.
- Being tall. This one is pretty irrational. People often say they wish they were my height (just shy of 5’8″), but I wouldn’t mind going down a few inches. I love heels, but never wear them because I feel like I tower over people.
- Fad diets. I’m much happier in my “I’ll eat whatever I want in moderation” state of mind. Seeing all of my Facebook friends rave about their latest Paleo or low-carb diet kills me.
- Daily Selfies. Sure I do a selfie here and there when I’m having a good hair day, but I really don’t need a day-by-day account of your various flattering angles.
- Hipsters. What does that even mean anymore?
- People hating on my pole dancing class. Broaden your horizons, folks. It’s great exercise!
- Losing my pens at work. Good thing I keep extras in my folder at all times!
What are some things that drive you crazy? I would love to see your list.
Next up, 21 thing I LOVE!